Thursday, July 9, 2009

Just really trying to figure out....

How in the world to post. So much has gone on in the last week and I have been in awe of what God has done. How He went before me to prepare my heart and my mind for the week He knew would exhaust me. I wasn't surprised just totally amazed at the way scripture, sermons, Bible study and music all came together to prepare me for the battle that we would be in.

I have repeatedly had the words Be Still put in front of me. Because I talk with my hands as much as my mouth, be still also means be quiet. :)So this week when my human gut reaction was to speak, my heart felt the Spirit tug and say be still and quiet. THAT my friend was and is hard.

Very hard.

I will defend my family and friends with everything in me and when one of them is hurt,I become a 5'1" pit bull.

God taught me several years ago that He doesn't always need me to vocally defend my loved ones to another person...He wants me to fight that battle on my knees. I can already see God's hand and even though there are still unresolved issues, Light has been brought to a dark corner.

If I have learned anything in my life, it's that when you start shining Light in the dark corners, you see all the filth you have worked so hard to hide. Some of that dirt and grime can be old and it may be hard work to get a deep clean. That process can't be accomplished on your own. It takes getting real honest with God and allowing Him to show you all the cobwebs, the dirt, all that junk that is keeping you stuck in that dark corner. For me, it meant I had to own up and admit that my choices had affected others. That my friend can be the hardest thing, however...

Submitting to that process and allowing God to clean out my dark corners was the most freeing experience.

Not easy to talk about, not easy to walk through but worth every tear. We are letting God clean out another corner in our life right now and it hurts. It is hard, BUT.....

There is freedom when you live in the Light. We know this and are already thanking God for the process. Only He can clean out this corner. So we are being still (and quiet in my case!) and looking forward to the day when this dark corner is clean and we can say look at what happened when we added Light in this corner.


jenmom said...

Thank you so much for this word. You don't know how much I need to hear exactly what you said.
We have had family in our home this week also. And without a very long story, they live in a very dark corner. It has been a long and heartbreaking week for me. My eyes fill with tears now just reflecting on all that is going on in this family member's life!
Pray for me and my family as we attempt to shine some Light in this dark corner.
By the way I have received the Matthew West cd. Thank you again!

Holly said...

There is nothing like obedience like you have done here, Stephanie. It is freeing and cleansing and good.

Blessings on you and your home.

Leah said...

Sounds like a very tough week, my friend. God is still good and I know He is pleased with you.

God is a master at cleaning out those dark corners of His children's lives. He desires that we live completely and totally in the light.

God bless you.

PS. I did not get to the PO today but as of today I have not received the Matthew West CD. I'll check tomorrow.


Kimberly Hurd Horst said...

Thank you for your post. Yup, when God cleans up our house, our life, he wants to clean up every room! He goes for the cobwebs and looks under rugs!

Well, thanks again. I am a new reader and excited about that!

Kimberly from Isanti, MN