Masks

Our pastor recently preached on taking masks off, my friend Carol posted about masks, last week our Sunday school teacher touched on this topic. My real life friend Angela and I continually talk about taking the mask off and getting "real". Seems to be a theme over and over in my life.

To say I live this way (mask free)all the time would be a lie. For the most part, I try to be transparent. I never want to leave an impression that I think I'm "all that and a box of chocolate" as one of my dear friends would say. :) The truth is, I can't take a step without Jesus. One of the hardest things for me to do is make friends. Sure, I love all the fellowship! I crave that. I can talk to you, pray with you, socialize with you but to enter into deep friendship scares me to death. I am very guarded in "real life". Granted, every time God places this in front of me and I choose to take this step, HE blesses me beyond imagination.

How I love to watch and be apart of women interacting with each other. We talk family. We share details of our husbands, our children, our in-laws (or out-laws!). We spend hours talking make-up, clothing, underwear :) No topic is left untouched. But I would venture to say that 9 times out of 10, that's where it stops. I love to talk about all those things, what woman doesn't!! How much do we miss because we're afraid to go any deeper. Deeper in our relationships with each other and with God.

My most meaningful friendships are shared with those few ladies that I am totally mask free with. They know my weaknesses, my fears, my failures. They are the first to pray, cry and rejoice with me. They know those little details about me that can only come from a mask free relationship.

The longer I am in this land of blog, the more God shows me the importance of mask free living. It's easy to do here via the "interweb" as boomama calls it. Most of you will not see me in the grocery store, or at church! So it's easy to be the real me here. But God doesn't always operate in the "easy" mode does He?!

Here's what He is impressing on my heart for this time.

First. He's working out this fear issue in me. The fear of rejection. It's something we've been working on for several months, but I haven't been able to post about that just yet. This fear has been an idol in my life. I have hid behind it for the last time. He's asking me to take a huge step and be as transparent as I am in blogland, in real life.

Secondly, there are several ladies in my neighborhood that He has placed on my heart. I've felt since the summer that I was to host a Bible study in my home. To make an effort to develop authentic relationships with people that live around me. In January I am going to start this, so I ask you blog siesta's to pray with me that God will show me all the little details. ( What study, how and who to approach...) Pray that I will not chicken out of this. He's placed it on my heart for sometime and I can't do this without Him.

Okay girls, this next thing is the scariest of all. Brace yourselves. I'm taking the mask completely off here. On Monday, I'll post perhaps the most revealing thing I've ever posted. It's just what God is asking me to do and that is the ONLY reason I would ever do this.

I love you siesta's!!