Sunday, October 7, 2007

What Completes Me?

I thought I would wait until Monday to post again, but there is something stirring in me that I've just got to get out!!!

My Mom always has a little something for the girls when we go home, but last week when we were unpacking, she told me she left Chad and I something on our bed. For Chad, she had the new Casting Crowns CD. That was a gift from God because he had just commented in the car that he would have liked to have bought it before his 9 hour car ride!! For me, she had a book entitled "LifeStories" by Mark Hall the lead singer and songwriter for Casting Crowns. It is awesome and is what I've been reading ever since. Get this book if you don't have it already. :)

Over the last few weeks I've heard several women make comments about a man or their children "completing" them. It seems to be a recurring theme through a few blogs I've read as well. Last night as I was reading "Lifestories", I came across this theme again.

Mark uses the famous movie scene from Jerry McGuire. You know the one. Tom Cruise looks into the eyes of Rennee Zellweger and says "You Complete Me." Remember that line? Women in theaters everywhere, myself being one of them, cried and swooned over that one. How romantic we all thought. Every girlfriend I had at that time mentioned that line and longed for their man to speak those words to her. I think the concept of this statement is awesome, we all want to feel needed loved and appreciated by the men in our life. God did create woman to complete and be a helpmate to her husband. What concerns me, is that so many women are looking to their man or other relationships to complete, or fill up every part of their hearts.

A few years ago, Chad and I had what I thought was a huge disagreement. Understand, Chad doesn't fight or argue, he refuses to because of what he lived as a child. But for whatever reason, we had words, he shut down and I pouted. I retreated to our bedroom and wrote him a letter, in the most loving of tones I might add. :) Just as I finished this detailed description of Chad's faults and suggestions of ways he should change to better meet my current needs, God convicted my heart. What I had written wasn't what Chad needed to hear, big surprise. I opened my Bible and read, prayed and then I just sat and listened.

God impressed on my heart that Chad would never be able to be my everything. He's human and that is impossible. On top of that, it was very unfair of me to expect him to! What God taught me was that I was to concentrate on the most important relationship in my life first. That relationship isn't with Chad, it's with Jesus Christ. No one else can or will do. I wept because that letter I had written was all about what I needed Chad to do for me, to make me feel better about me.....It pretty much said "me, me, me, I, I, I, I..." get the picture?

Looking back we were so tired, spinning our wheels trying to meet each need of every person in our life. It was exhausting! When I committed to put my relationship with God first and let HIM fill me up, it freed Chad. Freed Him to be the husband God intended him to be, not the husband Stephanie said she needed. Those two didn't look alike, because our priorities were all out of order. I e-mailed Chad sharing what God had told me and I apologized for placing so much pressure on him. Things began to change.

Hear me here, we are not perfect and do not have the perfect marriage. I would love to be able to tell you that we never argue or disagree, but we do. There are times when I want to pinch his head off!! Any "success" as the world would call it, is simply by the grace of God. We are two people who are crazy about each other, but crazier about God.

God's love is the only thing that will ever complete you. The enemy has a crafty way of making you believe otherwise. I know, I've lived it. Praise the Lord that my God is the God of restoration, healing, and completeness..... He will satisfy like none other.

Psalm 90:14 "Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days."


Angela @ Refresh My Soul Blog said...

Great post! I think life would be easier if we all could get that! :)
Much love,

Leah said...

What awesome words that so many likely need to hear!

I had never looked at your profile before--you are in Dacula. Greg and I lived in Dacula for 3+ years. His dental practice was at Hamilton Mill Publix and we lived about a mile down 124. We now live in Blairsville in North Ga. I enjoy your posts on Beth Moore's website and now that I have found your blog i'll be enjoying that too.


Leah said...


Greg and I didn't go to Hebron. When we moved to Dacula in 1996 we were members at Mt. Paran Central. Eventually the drive got to be too much and we joined North Metro FBC in Lawrenceville. I still stay in contact with the pastor and his wife, Frank and Mary Cox.

Dacula was just a small town when we moved there but now the whole place is a city!! It is amazing. I don't miss the traffic AT ALL. I had a 40 mile drive to work at Emory each day.

BTW, are you going to Fiesta Siesta next year? My friend Cindy and I are going. We already have tickets but having made plane or hotel reservations yet. We are very excited.


darla said...

In my life I have found that a concsious decision to allow Christ to complete me is the only way to submit and/or follow HIM. HE is our everything, and the only one who can truly love us the way we want or need. It is a beautiful thing when the decision is made that HE is the lover of our soul, it kind of leaves everyone else off the hook, and allows them to be human, make mistakes and find the mercy and forgiveness that they also need to experience. I love to visit you, sorry I don't comment as time has become very crazy, but at least two times a week I travel through blogsville and check on my fav princess' Love ya Darla

Anonymous said...

Thanks for this reminder. We put so much pressure on the very ones we love the most to be something to us that they were not created to be. I praise God that only He is enough! We need to fall on him and let our loved ones off the hook! HE IS IT!!!

Abby said...

ahh!! ps 90:14 is my life verse! LOVE IT!!!!!

thanks for this post...i am as single as they come, and independent as a sign post (sometimes too much) but because of past issues of insecurity and self-worth am still very much in a season of learning that Christ completes me, that i am FULL in Him, and i don't need a dang thing else! (although i do want to have a family, the Lord knows that and He will allow that to happen when it's right)

but until then...lovin' ps 90 ;)

~Robyn~ said...

I am going through this same thing, to a degree. I am trying to keep my eyes on Jesus, and when I truly do, things really seem to be better. As long as I don't open my mouth and let Robyn's words come out.

Thanks for this post, I needed the reminder!

jodi said...

I love this post! It took me until I was 32 to "get it", but I'm glad I do now.

I plan to get that book you referred to. I am a HUGE fan of Casting Crowns!

Videogal said...

Thanks for this post. This is something I've struggle with as well. Unfortunately, it takes some of us (ME!!) a while to "get" this.

The Small Scribbler said...

Golly! It feels like I haven't been here in forever. This post drives home an excellent point but what I am walking away with is this:

There are times when I want to pinch his head off!!

And I'm laughing very hard.