Thursday, June 5, 2008

Temper, Temper, Temper

I'm just going to shoot totally straight with you today. I had a full blown temper tantrum last night. Me, the mommy of this house. I came home from choir, and within 30 minutes was aggravated to the point of just going to bed.

Looking back, the trigger of this emotional melt down wasn't really that big of a deal and really has no eternal significance, but at the time I was so mad.

It all stems from my OCD about the kitchen. There are just somethings that bug me, and dishes in my sink bug me. They make me feel like I'm suffocating. I know, it's weird. It doesn't bother me at other people's homes, but in my kitchen I have to have an empty sink.

Let me tell you how "full" the sink was and you'll see how ludicrous my reaction was. There was a mixing bowl, a measuring cup, a spatula (or flipper as my girls call it) and a skillet. That was it.

What sent me over the edge was that the syrup and butter dish had been left on the table...for 3 hours. (Chloe made pancakes for dinner and did an excellent job.) Cleaning up sticky syrup is never fun, but sticky syrup that has been on the table for 3 hours...that is another level of gross.

I get it cleaned up, pout a little bit, make Chad feel really bad, then go upstairs to find toys and hair stuff all over Emma's room. SOOOO, I give the girls a lecture on picking up after themselves, as if they have never heard this before. After their lecture, I tuck them into bed..real great mom..fuss at them right before bed time.

I was so done by the time I came downstairs that I went to bed before 9:30. ME. The night owl.

Bless Chad's heart, he apologized but I wasn't in the mood for an apology...I just wanted someone, anyone to acknowledge that they understood why I was so aggravated.

Since I went to bed so early, I was wide awake around 1:30 or so. I just stayed in bed and stared at the ceiling, flabbergasted at my attitude and actions. I'm asking God why a mixing bowl and a little syrup set me off like that. About that time, I heard a beep. It was my cell phone. The battery was going dead. I had not plugged it in yesterday and it was going on a "quick charge" leftover from Tuesday. The battery was becoming weak. Running out of juice. On it's last charge. Going dead. Hmmmmmmmm..........

Okay God I get it. The past two weeks have been busy. My time with the Lord has been rushed and I have not had my weekly "retreat" with the Him. In a sense, I have tried to do life with a "quick charge". For this mommy, a quick charge just doesn't cut it and everyone around me suffers for it. I need a daily charge to live and function properly!

So I get up this morning thankful that His mercy is new and that God is the King of do-overs. I love that this was one of the verses in my Psalm reading this morning.

Psalm 90:14 "Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days."

I'm looking forward to turning the phones off and retreating this afternoon while my people are at karate. After the last few days, I need a long Holy Spirit super charge.

Ironically, or maybe not, the attribute/character of God that I've been assigned to soak in this week (for Freedom's Call) is "All Powerful". I'll be sharing some of that later in the week.

On a lighter note...

Chad posted some of his favorite pictures yesterday and this was one of his favorites of the's a favorite of mine too...

I can't stay aggravated at these two cuties for too long. :)


Heather C said...

That is a GREAT picture!

I'm worshipping the King of Do-overs right alongside you today. Thanks for this wonderful analogy!

What is Freedom's Call?


BethAnne said...

I so hear what you are saying!! I am with you - a quick time in the Word is not enough for me either. It may be okay for some people who are more naturally sweet and compassionate, but not me - I need some serious time with the Lord.

Those are some seriously beautiful girls you have!! And I mean beautiful!!! Must take after their mom.

jodi said...

Whew...I can so relate to you on this post. Can't tell you how many times I've lost it over dumb house stuff! Love your perspective on it (like a dying cell phone!) and appreciate your honesty. I'll miss reading you while I'm gone!!! :)

Meg said...

Yep...The mini retreats sound awesome. I think I need that myself. Good thoughts and thanks for sharing. Love, Meg

jennyhope said...

I so know what you mean. Crazy story but when I was pregnant and on bed rest I made rod go take pictures of the sink and downstairs to make sure there were no dishes in the sink. Get a grip right? I can't stand it. Also, I know what you mean about trying to live on quick charge it just doesn't cut it for me either. Everything is crazy. If I don't have my time in the morning it just effects me bad. ITs not just seriously effect everything. =)

Julie said...

I could relate to this post. Although I do not have children, I have had a meltdown at the mess left in the kitchen after my husband cooks or I'm gone and he doesn't clean up.

I love the way God spoke through your cell phone battery going dead. I needed to hear that. Thank you for sharing.

Cheri said...

How mant times have I done this myself? Too many!!

Thank God he lets us have do-overs!

Cute pic :)

LAURIE said...

I enjoyed your post today, I guess because I can totally relate to everything you said. First of all I am also OCD and more than one time I have flown off the handle about something very insignificant like a glass left in the family room. I loved your analogy of the phone needing to be charged, what a great reminder to all of us the importance of charging our spirit by spending time with the One who gives us our energy. -Blessings, Laurie

jenmom said...

Oh Stephanie, I just wanted to cry reading your post. I have been right there more times than I care to confess! I am so glad His mercies are new EVERY morning for us mommies and our breakdowns over three hour syrup messes!!!!!! Oh God is so Good and I love Him so!!!!!!

Heather said...

OH- those girls ARE precious! But I am the same way about dishes in my sink! :) I also think when you come home at the end of a "day," no matter if it has been one hour or a full 8-hour work just like to see that things are neat and clean...instead of having more work for you to do!
I posted about my "pop quiz" from God that we talked about before ...maybe you can weigh in when you get time?!?!

Always love reading your thoughts...and today was no exception!

darla-princess overcomer said...

hear you!! we all fall to this trap from time to time..but it is our reality check and it always means I am running on my own strength and not HIS..I just had my own melt down yesterday, and yes...I need more time with Jesus!

your cuties are CUTE! love them!

Carol said...

What a cute picture! You are I are so alike. Clutter and disorder makes my blood boil. It suffocates me like I can't breathe. I always tell myself I'm being ridiculous, but there it is. I am completely and totally flawed. I'm with you girl. I've have moments like these myself.

Angela @ Refresh My Soul Blog said...

Oh girl! I too had a big girl temper tantrum this week too. It was too about nothing significant enough to even warrant it. Instead there were just hurt feelings and a bad example.
I too have been praising God as the God of do overs and whose mercies are new every morning. I cannot do it on quick charge either.
Much love girl-thanks for being real!

Fran said...

Oh Steph...I am so understanding this one too. No quick charge for doesn't work, but why do we keep doing it???

I bet you have had a great day today!! Stay in the Word girl. I will too. :)

Love ya~