I wasn't supposed to be home tonight...

But I am and that is okay. After a long week it is nice just be home in my comfy clothes playing on the computer. :)

Chloe is playing with a friend down the street for a little while this evening. Emma and Chad are playing the Wii. (She is recovering from the tummy bug and is enjoying having Daddy's undivided attention.)

I am feeling the need to try and make sense of some of the things from the conference I was at this week.

I shared earlier that the topic of fear had been touched on and as HUGE as that was for me, other than Sunday, it was never touched on again. The rest of the conference challenged the way I view something that is personal: money. Oh boy...

I want God to be Lord of everything and every part of my life. My outward actions, my thoughts...and the money he entrusts us with. After this week I can not even say "my" money anymore. Don't get me wrong...the last 2 years have been the shall we say leanest times of our marriage, so please don't think there is a huge amount of money sitting in our bank account just waiting to be given away. There isn't...I wish there was...because I want so bad to help those who are struggling...it's a passion of mine. Anyway...

So Bruce Wilkinson is in the process of writing a new book/teaching series that is entitled "You Were Born for This." Here is a little info from the conference flyer...

We all sense everyone around us needs a miracle—God
wants you today and everyday to bring a miracle of hope, or
a breakthru, or a new lifemap, or a restoration—to give to
people what Jesus gave those around him and promised you
would too—miracles that will glorify God in people’s lives.
Do not settle for less as you love your neighbor—come be
equipped to help others with what Christ wants you to do
uniquely for them.

This series will reveal 7 Keys that result in
predictable miracles as you serve others following the
promises and patterns of the Bible. God isn’t reluctant to
show His power on your behalf—but actually seeks for people
who will live in such a way that they don’t stop His
miraculous power!

Sound good? Well let me tell you..he taught 3 keys in this particular church and I can not wait to get the book and read the others.

Back to the money thing. For almost two years a LOT of my fear has had something to do with money. Not having enough...not being able to meet our needs, much less help another person...you get the idea. I'm sure some of you have the same sort of issues. :)

My thinking and mindset on money had a total and I mean TOTAL transformation this week. I am ashamed to admit this, but there is freedom in confessing so here goes. I realized this week that I had made money and all the emotions that come along with it, an idol. For two years I have told myself..."as Chad grow this business and as money gets better, this would happen or that would happen." Up to this week, as much as I have wanted to help in certain situations, or give to a particular charity...I just could not justify it. And here is the kicker...I would NOT give because I felt what I could give was not a large amount..therefore..not worthy to be given.

Isn't that just like the enemy? To make you believe that what you have isn't good enough? Well he is wrong. WRONG! Bruce shared some practical ways to use the money God has entrusted to you produce some good fruit for our Jesus. Okay here is one...

The God Pocket. The idea is that you set aside a small place in your wallet or purse that you place an amount of money in.(that amount is determined between you and God) As you go out and about your day you ask God to show you who needs it. It may be standing in the line at the grocery store...at the gas station...the waitress that serves you at lunch...or the Doctor's office. God will let you know when to use the God pocket money. The only thing is...you HAVE to make sure and tell the recipent that it's God's money and that He wanted them to have it. You are just the delivery person so make sure you let all the glory go to the giver..and that giver is God. The girls and I are doing this and can't wait for the first time God prompts us to use it!

I'm praying that this one concept shows our family that little is much when God is in it. Our $5, $10 or $20 right now may be HUGE to someone else.

Oh and you know what? Mama Siesta Beth got all up in my face with this same sort of concept today in my Bible study...as tough as that pill was to swallow...I love it when God does this in my life. He really does hear us you know.

Well...this is so much longer than I intended and I'm praying that it makes sense...I'm going to skip proof reading and play Wii with my man. Our last two rounds of golf, I've beat him by like oh...15 strokes! It's so hard to be this good....